Kara Kum A Fish Story on the Grandest Scale.
I’m going to tell you a story, which you can believe or not. This story is a rumor that has been passing around Kara Kum for a while now and I figure I should let you normals know about it, as I know it to be the truth.
Who am I? Where and what is Kara Kum? Slow down there Mr. Johnson and I’ll tell ya. Not so many questions all at once.
My name is Diem, Carpe Diem. I am a slippery fish.
I can hear you laughing. Really, I’m a goldfish, part of the carp family. My father thought it would be funny to call me “Carpe’ since our last name was Diem. My father was an American domestic goldfish, he has a cras sense of humor.
My mother, god rest her soul, was a french domestic goldfish. I grew up and lived my entire life in a fish tank in the American embassy in Paris. I would have still been living there if some jerk hadn’t decided to play an April Fools joke and poured red die in the tank. Ha Ha, long story short we all go belly up, but a few of us were still breathing. Some stupid maid decided we’re all dead and flushed us one by one. Needless to say I drown.
When you drown on April Fools day, you don’t go to heaven, you don’t go to hell, you go to Kara Kum. My father is here too. But this story doesn’t involve him and our sad story. This is the story Alma. She is one of you, a normal, she lived most of her life in reality. But, read the story, it will answer all your questions. If you will excuse me now it is time for my wine and cheese, and I miss that for nor fish or man.